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The Sunday Series (135), with Mark Brodinsky

January 15, 2017 By markbrodinsky Leave a Comment

Life is all about love. How we love others and how we love ourselves. Simple concepts but in practice, especially the latter, can be a challenge… mainly because we don’t always know how.

This inability can define our path, at least for a time, and we get lost along the way. Sometimes we stray so far we fall into darkness, and the light to lead us back appears dim. But there is always light. It may not be much light, but it’s there.

On this road to redemption, back to love, understanding and acceptance of who we are, we learn a great deal. This lesson becomes part of our journey, it tells a story.

As we all know, everyone has a story.

I am Mark Brodinsky and this is The Sunday Series.


The Sunday Series (135): Mind-Full

At 22-years-old she’s got it figured out, more so than most people twice her age. Spend any time speaking with Ashley Zahabian and you’ll see clearly, because she does.

Considering it’s been less than a decade since she was malnourished, scared and emotionally distraught, Ashley has made such tremendous strides it has literally caused the earth to tremor, since this girl, now woman, is trying to move the world. She’s literally a rising star.

Ashley first shared her story, (http://markbrodinsky.com/sunday-series-106-mark-brodinsky/), many months ago and was just starting to ride the wave she had created. It’s worthy of an update because the wave is building, a wave this young lady is forcibly pushing to help fix the way people think, to help put them in control of their minds and by consequence take control of their lives.

Ashley went through the pain of an eating disorder, hospitalized, in day-to-day counseling at the age of 14. But it was a blessing in disguise since she got the chance to work on her problems, to talk about things, something in truth so many need, but she also took the time during her isolation to study, to learn, to personally develop and realize the biggest thing holding her back was the one thing on which she had lost her grip… her mind.

It was the beginning of her new journey into her passion and purpose to teach others about the concept of emotional intelligence, your EI, and how it can change your life by teaching you to take control of your emotions and your reactions to those emotions.

“EI is the ability to feel and to be aware of emotion”, says Ashley. “But have the brain capacity and control to fight that emotion when necessary. I lived the example. Going through an eating disorder, without even realizing I am doing it because when someone tells me I can lose a few pounds an emotion goes through my body and the back part of my brain, called the amygdala, stores that situation, creating a memory or emotion which is then fight or flight. If I feel that again I will have an impulsive reaction and by the time it reaches the rational part of my brain it’s already reactive. It was me and being sick because I acted on that feeling… I didn’t eat. But someone who has mastered emotional intelligence has the brain capacity to fight that emotion. Now if someone tells them they are overweight, it still hurts, but you have the control to battle back.”

Basically it’s your mind telling part of your brain to not let your emotions control your life. You stay in control and your life becomes better because of it… dousing the flames of the fire in your mind which left uncontrolled can become an inferno.

It makes sense and science backs up what Ashley is teaching. Conditions such as anxiety, autism, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, and phobias are suspected of being linked to abnormal functioning of the amygdala. As Ashley explains gaining control of this part of your brain is like riding a young horse. When you first hop on the animal is unsure, irrational, emotional and lacks control, until you teach it. You can do the same thing with your brain. The trick is to get the frontal lobe, where rational thought takes place to take the reins over your amygdala. But that frontal lobe is late to develop in life, so finding a way to speed up that development and increase your reasoning means you get more control of your life. More control is a path to more happiness and success.

  

But let’s get back to the person who is preaching and teaching this – talk about being on fire – Ashley, has just created and been approved to actually teach a course at a university on emotional intelligence and leadership. Let’s not forget Ashely is 22 and just graduating from this same college herself.  The course will be offered in the fall at The Feliciano School of Business at Montclair State University. The same business school from which Ashley will graduate in the spring.

Understand AZ and her EI mean business! (https://www.ashleyzahabian.com/)

Ashley has already opened on stage for the likes of Gary Vaynerchuk, been interviewed by Grant Cardone, worked with Eric Thomas (ET), has a Ted Talk coming up in March in Vancouver and she’s working on a book about EI. In the world of personal development and self-improvement, Ashley is making tremendous strides and is doing it for one reason… to serve the world. “It’s not about me, it’s about the mission”, says Ashley. “It’s not about you and it never will be. It’s how you serve, how you give. Don’t create something for yourself, create something for the world.”

  

One of the reasons Ashley is so focused, so driven, is her ability to be in control, to know her EI and to know it’s more important than her IQ. She says one of the best ways to feed your emotional intelligence is meditation. “You are sitting there and feeling thoughts and the meditation teaches you not to give in to this urge and push it aside while you are meditating. It helps academic scores, business success, relationships and every part of your life. A lot of research shows as your EI increases, your income increases, your business and interview skills get better, you are more aware of what’s going on and how to serve people. It’s so subtle but it makes a big difference. You can actually pick up on what other people are thinking and how they are feeling and reacting because you are so aware.”

It’s not only what’s in Ashley’s mind, it’s what’s in her heart… and you can feel it when you spend any time talking with her. Just crossing over two decades into this life, Ashley has a heart full of good to give. The WHY that drives her is because she appreciates, as we all should, that no one is getting out of here alive, we are all going to die.. and this one fact should drive you to LIVE. While you are here, why wouldn’t you do all you can with all you have been given? Ashley turned her issues, her sickness, her isolation, her intense study of herself and of personal growth, into a tornado of understanding how the mind works and the gift of sharing and giving.

“I want the world to understand that EI controls everything. It is the most powerful drive in our brain and because everything we do is emotional essence you must learn to control that. Emotional intelligence will lead you to discover the one thing I did, that life is more than just you.”

“With all that we do, we must always keep society in mind. We must think about the person to our left and to our right, and not much about ourselves. It’s a decision every leader makes, and I believe that’s what keeps dreams alive.” – AZ

Until next time thanks for taking the time,

Mark Brodinsky

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Author: The #1 Amazon Best Seller: It Takes 2. Surviving Breast Cancer: A Spouse’s Story
(http://www.amazon.com/Mark-Brodinsky/e/B00FI6R3U6)

Huffington Post: (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mark-brodinsky/)

The Profile: (http://www.talkinggood.com/profiles/MarkBrodinsky)

The Podcast: (https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/sunday-series-courage-inspiration/id1028611459)

Biz Impact: http://www.prweb.com/releases/markbrodinsky/072015/prweb12862708.htm

Company “Stories”: http://www.ushacareers.com/news/

For more info contact Mark: markbrodinsky@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

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Blog Reviews

Love seeing new blogs hit the ground running like this one (by a dad no less), but I also urge anyone vaguely interested in blogging to stay tuned, I am. Good luck on your journey – glad that I am along for the ride.

Rachel Blaufeld

Great blog Mark! I always appreciate reading what you have to say. You are very gifted and talented and hopefully someday you’ll not just blog, but write a book.

 Stephen Koncurat

I’m definitely along for the ride. We’ve all seen how much damage the written word can inflict. More positive writers are needed. And I love how you are using your personal experiences – those with your wife and children – and your gift of writing to open eyes and to inspire others.

Victoria Endicott

Absolutely beautifully written! The girls in your life must be very proud of you. Thanks for sharing Mark, I look forward to reading more!

Gina Glick Jolson

Very shortly this site will be famous amid all blogging and site-building users, due to it’s pleasant posts.

Leila Galloway

Absolutely beautiful! Are you at all thinking of penning a book? You’ve got a fan base out there that really thinks you should Mark. You write so eloquently. Glad that I got onto this site.

Marilyn Lefkowitz

Mark, You are truly a gifted writer and obviously, a special father and husband . Always a delight to read your words.

I’m speechless…beautiful words flow from your heart just like a gentle waterfall into a tranquil stream… thank you so much for the friend request I was blessed the day I clicked confirm.

Lynne Turner Dorsey

From your first writing in 4th grade entitled “People” which was published in the school newspaper, you have always been able to write. Never more so than when you started “Caringbridge” and now your blog, everyone who reads says what a wonderful writer you are. Our DREAM for you is to become an author and encourage people every day. You are by the far the best and we hope and pray you reach your dream.

Bonnie Brodinsky

I know you always thank us for reading but I would like to say thanks for writing.

Stuart Abell

Great piece. You are an inspiration!

Rob Commodari

Mark I just wanted to let you know that you are succeeding in your “ultimate goal”. I have gained so much from your blogs. I look forward to reading them for the special lift that they give me. Thank you.

Amy F.

I love waking up and starting my day with my coffee and your blog! It a great way to start my day with positive uplifting thoughts!! It puts me in a positive frame of mind throughout the day and allows me to reflect on my personal life, make changes, and grow !!!

Gayle Blank

You are quite talented Mark. Thanks for sharing!

Cynthia

I always look forward to your Blog Mark. Thanks for sharing and as you always do, make it a great / remarkable Day!

Chuck Connolly

Thanks for your Blog Mark. It is fun, encouraging and a nice break from a day full of ups and downs.

Jackie Hetrick

With my busy schedule, there is (sadly) little time for reading. But I have two must-reads every time I come across them, the sports section and your blogs. Keep inspiring and following your dream!

Ed Nemec

Mark, you are a truly remarkable individual. You do speak from your heart, I can’t wait to read your book. You are an incredible writer.

Debbie Press

Mark, I am glad I clicked on your post this morning, which lead me to your writing, your goal.
Would like to connect. This speaks to me.

Aileen Braverman

I can’t wait to read the book. I have followed all the blogs and feel so good that I know u guys. You make me cry but you make me laugh too. All the very best to you!

Beverlee Rendelman

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WOW!!! It Takes 2 is a must read for anyone who has known someone diagnosed with cancer or other life threatening disease. This is the real story of a family lead by an incredible woman, Debbie Brodinsky, who took radical steps to beat the breast cancer beast. The story is told by her husband, Mark Brodinsky, through journal entries he kept starting with diagnosis through one year cancer free. This author's unique ability to pour his heart out onto the page draws you in from the beginning and holds you until the very end.

Thanks to Mark and Debbie Brodinsky for this gift...I have a new perspective on what it means to be a breast cancer survivor. You are a hero, Debbie Brodinsky!

TeeBThree
September 25, 2013

ittakes2_reviews_2

This book gives a heartfelt, in depth description of what it is like to go through breast cancer with the one you love. It is beautifully written and I felt as though I was living it with them! I highly recommend this book!

Jgs17
September 24, 2013

ittakes2_reviews_2

In It Takes 2, Mark Brodinsky windows us into his world where his wife, the cancer patient, is not the only victim. Part journal, part roadmap, It Takes 2 goes to the real humanity of facing the mortality of one's better half. Mark's candid perspective, love, and fierce intention resonate with hope in a story which is about much more than cancer. Mark himself is perhaps the most heroic character for the way he appreciates this life and so many of us in it...as he says, "thanks for caring."

Réné Pallace
September 24, 2013

ittakes2_reviews_2

It Takes Two: A Spouse's Story by Mark Brodinsky should be read by every person who is experiencing serious illness or injury or by a loved one of someone who is experiencing either of those situations. The book is an eloquent testament to the power of love and the healing energy derived from the belief that things will get better. There is not one word of "poor me" from the author or his wife who suffered breast cancer and the radical surgery she elected to have to beat the cancer. Rather, the book is a celebration of the courage displayed by them both in seeing it through.

The book also encourages readers to speak and write down their true feelings and be validated in them. John Mackovic writing in the Palm Springs, CA Desert Sun on November 2, 2013 quoted author and artist Doe Zantamata who said, " To be happy, you don't have to do anything new. You just have to remember how to believe again...Believe everything good is possible. Believe in your dreams. Believe in people. Believe in love. But most of all...believe in yourself." The author, his wife, their family and extended family and friends never stopped believing in his wife's recovery, and I think, in themselves. Read this book and believe.

Paul A. Riecks
November 4, 2013

ittakes2_reviews_2

This book is a must read for anyone with a family member with breast cancer. It takes you through the spouse's perspective from diagnosis to recovery. Mark journaled his wife's journey and put all of his emotions out there. It is beautifully written and inspiring to anyone going through breast cancer. Thank you, Mark for sharing Debbie's story.

Jmu1109
October 23, 2013

ittakes2_reviews_2

A friend recommended this book. This was a great perspective of a man standing beside his partner and passing along to the reader fear, hope, useful information and a broader story than his own. I loved Vinnie the tattoo artist. This is a great book. Thanks for sharing, Mark and "thanks for caring"

Blahsan

ittakes2_reviews_2

This book is a must read. What sets this book apart from other books about surviving breast cancer is that it is told by the husband and his point of view, not from the survivor. At times sad, at times poignant but even through the worst of it you can always feel the love he has for his wife, her strength and the strength of their extended family and friends. The posts that are included from their friends and family lets you really into the heart and strength of the family. I would recommend this book to anyone who is currently going through this, whether you are the person or the caregiver. I also recommend this book to anyone who has a friend that has been or is currently going through their fight now. It was an eye opener for me.

L. Bogash
Seven Valleys, PA

ittakes2_reviews_2

There isn't a shortage of books about breast cancer, but most are written from the perspective of the person who has battled cancer or a physician or other expert. What an enlightening experience to read about breast cancer from a husband and caregiver's perspective! Not only does the author give us insight into his wife's experience and emotions, but he openly shares and reveals his love, compassion, support, and, yes, sometimes anger at the disease as he stands by his wife's side during their journey to beat the beast. Your story may not be the same, but I guarantee if you have a loved one battling cancer, you won't go wrong reading It Takes 2.

 PattiM
September 25, 2013

 

ittakes2_reviews_2

From the moment I opened this book I never stopped reading. Mark invites the reader to come along on this journey that his family went through. I cried, laughed and learned so much. This book will give comfort and knowledge to those going through similar situations. Most importantly, Mark and his family never give up. They get knocked down and get right back up. They fought cancer together and with their strength, determination and will to prevail... They do!

 Jenny Schloss 

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I heard that yesterday, Thanksgiving Day, the word thankful was tweeted out more than 3.8 million times. Not at our house, at least for a few hours last night, it was only spoken. How about at your home? On Wednesday I wrote the blog post about how I planned for a phone-free Thanksgiving, (http://markbrodinsky.com/350ghost-of-thanksgiving-past-its-just-about-life/), at least from […]

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