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The Sunday Series (114), with Mark Brodinsky

July 24, 2016 By markbrodinsky Leave a Comment

The days are long, but life is short. Some days seem longer than others, especially when there appears to be darkness instead of light. But appearances can be deceiving.

For every impossible situation there is hope. It’s a matter of believing. Have faith. Learn to fight. Try to forgive.

Life can be a stern teacher, but can also be an unbelievable friend. During our time on this earth life gives us an education which becomes our story.

Everyone has a story.

I am Mark Brodinsky and this is The Sunday Series.


The Sunday Series (114): A Whole New World

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Liz Byrne is happy, she’s arrived. Or at least on this path along her life’s journey, this page in her book, it’s a time to cherish. A super successful businesswoman, a loving wife, a devoted mother. She will even go so far as to say her life is “simple and boring”.

“We don’t do anything”, says Liz. “We have two toddlers, life is work, and the kids. Tim and I are so committed to the kids’ routine and we have opposite schedules, so we have an understanding and we make it work. I’m busy with my agents on my sales team. Tim gets home to make dinner for Michael and Gabby, gives them a bath and handles some big responsibilities. I especially respect what he does because he’s out running around all day as the lead on an Emergency Reaction Team for NASA. But he does whatever it takes. It works. We work.”

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Liz says sometimes Tim tells her he feels like he’s “Daddy Daycare”. But, she laughs, “I tell him, ‘babe, it’s called parenting’.” And while these days life might appear boring and simple, for Liz it’s all good. The experience of her life is joyful, impactful, and meaningful, since her childhood was anything but.

That’s because the first third of her life was spent living the one word we all try to conquer every day: fear.

Liz says, “I would lay in my bed at night and wish I would be anyone else in the whole wide world. My story was I never fit in and nobody liked me and it was based on believing what was happening to me. I’m believed I was living a story where I didn’t fit in and nobody cared.”

She continues, “When I was a kid we didn’t have money, my home life was not safe, my dad was very violent, not a good person. He was physically a horrible person, a sociopath, he was very volatile and terrifying. We lived in fear of him. He was the punisher, my mom was the protector. She would come sneak into my and my brother’s room and cry with us. It’s tough to grow up in a place with someone you are afraid of, someone you are supposed to look up to. As a kid it didn’t feel fair, or right.”

When our childhood is “right” it is something we look back on and remember fondly, a time of innocence where anything is possible, a place we feel safe, secure and harbor little fear, since fear is a learned response. But for Liz this time of joyful innocence was filled with dark memories of a man who became the thief in the night of her chance for a bright and “normal” existence.

But before she exited her teenage years, Liz says her mom got up the courage to get out. Her mom divorced her father and brought a new man into her life and Liz says her mom’s husband showed them the way. “He stepped up to the plate” says Liz. “He showed us it was possible to have a family where love lives and he was, (and is), a good example of what we could have, of what we could be.”

The new family with her Step-Dad

The new family with her Step-Dad

With love at the core and hope at the door, Liz got the courage to venture out as well, to distance herself from her past. She moved from Titusville, Florida to Orlando and saved her money. It gave her the foundation and the fortitude to make the big jump – to the Big Apple. “Moving to New York City was definitely me trying to get away”, says Liz. “I didn’t know a soul there, I had no job. I remember my cab ride to an apartment I had never seen, and thinking ‘holy crap’.” But she made it work.

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In the meantime Liz had also started traveling. She has been to 18 different countries and seen the world, through her own eyes, it made her realize things about her past, present and future.

Liz says, “There is that  saying – I felt sorry for myself because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. When you get out there in the world you see what real poverty is and what people’s real struggles are. It helped me come to a place where I didn’t harbor any feelings that I thought were still relevant about who I was.  It helped me create a new story.”

Hong Kong

Hong Kong

Thailand

Thailand

Liz’s travels eventually took her from New York, back to Florida, and a failed engagement that had her losing nearly everything and moving back into the house with her mom. The house was 11-hundred square feet. Liz shared a tiny spare bedroom with baby chicks and a trash bag with her belongings. It left her thinking hard – what would she do with the rest of her career?  Then in 2009 she answered an ad for an insurance company, which after a short time, led her to the doorstep of what is now USHEALTH Advisors and meeting Taraina McCants and Troy McQuagge.

Liz says with Taraina as her mentor she learned all she needed to know. “I went on a sales appointment with Taraina’s sister, Teaira. I recorded her presentation, listened to it like 40-thousand times, did it word for word, sold like a maniac and got out of my financial hole. I called Taraina like 150 times-a-day and she always answered the phone. If not for her I wouldn’t be where I am today.”

She continues, “Taraina takes the philosophy and beliefs of Troy McQuagge, (the CEO of USHEALTH Advisors), and passes it down to our leaders and agents. Agents come here with no hope and go from that place to a place where legacy for your family is possible because it is a supportive, genuine environment of complete sincerity and love. I had never experienced anything like that in my life. It is Troy’s big heart that has created this opportunity for all of us. This company is like a living body and the heartbeat starts with Troy. It’s like a passion and a calling. Everyone should have the opportunity to experience it.”

troy and liz taraina and liz

“To have the support I do at home, with my husband Tim as an amazing partner, husband and friend and to have the same experience at work too and have it all over my life, it’s something that’s extraordinary.”

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And what of those demons in the past?

The love from all around has helped to erase the memories of the tough childhood Liz endured – her travels around the world helped to open her heart and her mind, to give her perspective and to see her struggles in a different light. And then she took the final step to alleviate any residual fear and pain as well. Liz attended a Landmark Forum about making positive, permanent shifts in your life, accepting responsibility and making peace with your past.

Then she took a trip… to see her father.

It had been nearly a dozen years since the last time Liz laid eyes on the man who cast such a dark shadow on her childhood. “I just wanted to let him know I forgave him and what he put us through”, she says. When I found him he was just this “person”, not so terrifying. I went to see him as an adult and he was not whatever I thought he was when I was younger. He was very insecure and puny, no backbone, no accountability, just a pathological liar. I just thought, ‘wow he’s so weak’. And he was in denial of everything. It was interesting for me to perceive him as this weak man. No strength and nothing to be afraid of. I only saw my Dad once and that chapter of my life is complete now… closed.”

It was a turning point.

Liz says from where she began to where she is now she has learned so much: “It all boils down to being able to grow. Once I was able to forgive all these opportunities started popping up everywhere. At a certain point I decided in order to grow I had to accept responsibility and not live the life I was given and create something better. You have to choose to break the cycle. I didn’t want to live in a situation where I was poor, or live in fear.  Every day you must do something to make a difference. Don’t just strive for success and money, be of value and of service. Make a commitment, choose your own luck.”

And build yourself a whole new world.

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Until next time thanks for taking the time,

Mark

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Author: The #1 Amazon Best Seller: It Takes 2. Surviving Breast Cancer: A Spouse’s Story
(http://www.amazon.com/Mark-Brodinsky/e/B00FI6R3U6)

Huffington Post: (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mark-brodinsky/)

The Profile: (http://www.talkinggood.com/profiles/MarkBrodinsky)

The Podcast: (https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/sunday-series-courage-inspiration/id1028611459)

USHEALTH Advisors: (http://www.prweb.com/releases/markbrodinsky/072015/prweb12862708.htm)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Mark Brodinsky
Emmy Award Winner, 1996

Ever thought about writing a book? check this out!

Blog Reviews

Love seeing new blogs hit the ground running like this one (by a dad no less), but I also urge anyone vaguely interested in blogging to stay tuned, I am. Good luck on your journey – glad that I am along for the ride.

Rachel Blaufeld

Great blog Mark! I always appreciate reading what you have to say. You are very gifted and talented and hopefully someday you’ll not just blog, but write a book.

 Stephen Koncurat

I’m definitely along for the ride. We’ve all seen how much damage the written word can inflict. More positive writers are needed. And I love how you are using your personal experiences – those with your wife and children – and your gift of writing to open eyes and to inspire others.

Victoria Endicott

Absolutely beautifully written! The girls in your life must be very proud of you. Thanks for sharing Mark, I look forward to reading more!

Gina Glick Jolson

Very shortly this site will be famous amid all blogging and site-building users, due to it’s pleasant posts.

Leila Galloway

Absolutely beautiful! Are you at all thinking of penning a book? You’ve got a fan base out there that really thinks you should Mark. You write so eloquently. Glad that I got onto this site.

Marilyn Lefkowitz

Mark, You are truly a gifted writer and obviously, a special father and husband . Always a delight to read your words.

I’m speechless…beautiful words flow from your heart just like a gentle waterfall into a tranquil stream… thank you so much for the friend request I was blessed the day I clicked confirm.

Lynne Turner Dorsey

From your first writing in 4th grade entitled “People” which was published in the school newspaper, you have always been able to write. Never more so than when you started “Caringbridge” and now your blog, everyone who reads says what a wonderful writer you are. Our DREAM for you is to become an author and encourage people every day. You are by the far the best and we hope and pray you reach your dream.

Bonnie Brodinsky

I know you always thank us for reading but I would like to say thanks for writing.

Stuart Abell

Great piece. You are an inspiration!

Rob Commodari

Mark I just wanted to let you know that you are succeeding in your “ultimate goal”. I have gained so much from your blogs. I look forward to reading them for the special lift that they give me. Thank you.

Amy F.

I love waking up and starting my day with my coffee and your blog! It a great way to start my day with positive uplifting thoughts!! It puts me in a positive frame of mind throughout the day and allows me to reflect on my personal life, make changes, and grow !!!

Gayle Blank

You are quite talented Mark. Thanks for sharing!

Cynthia

I always look forward to your Blog Mark. Thanks for sharing and as you always do, make it a great / remarkable Day!

Chuck Connolly

Thanks for your Blog Mark. It is fun, encouraging and a nice break from a day full of ups and downs.

Jackie Hetrick

With my busy schedule, there is (sadly) little time for reading. But I have two must-reads every time I come across them, the sports section and your blogs. Keep inspiring and following your dream!

Ed Nemec

Mark, you are a truly remarkable individual. You do speak from your heart, I can’t wait to read your book. You are an incredible writer.

Debbie Press

Mark, I am glad I clicked on your post this morning, which lead me to your writing, your goal.
Would like to connect. This speaks to me.

Aileen Braverman

I can’t wait to read the book. I have followed all the blogs and feel so good that I know u guys. You make me cry but you make me laugh too. All the very best to you!

Beverlee Rendelman

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WOW!!! It Takes 2 is a must read for anyone who has known someone diagnosed with cancer or other life threatening disease. This is the real story of a family lead by an incredible woman, Debbie Brodinsky, who took radical steps to beat the breast cancer beast. The story is told by her husband, Mark Brodinsky, through journal entries he kept starting with diagnosis through one year cancer free. This author's unique ability to pour his heart out onto the page draws you in from the beginning and holds you until the very end.

Thanks to Mark and Debbie Brodinsky for this gift...I have a new perspective on what it means to be a breast cancer survivor. You are a hero, Debbie Brodinsky!

TeeBThree
September 25, 2013

ittakes2_reviews_2

This book gives a heartfelt, in depth description of what it is like to go through breast cancer with the one you love. It is beautifully written and I felt as though I was living it with them! I highly recommend this book!

Jgs17
September 24, 2013

ittakes2_reviews_2

In It Takes 2, Mark Brodinsky windows us into his world where his wife, the cancer patient, is not the only victim. Part journal, part roadmap, It Takes 2 goes to the real humanity of facing the mortality of one's better half. Mark's candid perspective, love, and fierce intention resonate with hope in a story which is about much more than cancer. Mark himself is perhaps the most heroic character for the way he appreciates this life and so many of us in it...as he says, "thanks for caring."

Réné Pallace
September 24, 2013

ittakes2_reviews_2

It Takes Two: A Spouse's Story by Mark Brodinsky should be read by every person who is experiencing serious illness or injury or by a loved one of someone who is experiencing either of those situations. The book is an eloquent testament to the power of love and the healing energy derived from the belief that things will get better. There is not one word of "poor me" from the author or his wife who suffered breast cancer and the radical surgery she elected to have to beat the cancer. Rather, the book is a celebration of the courage displayed by them both in seeing it through.

The book also encourages readers to speak and write down their true feelings and be validated in them. John Mackovic writing in the Palm Springs, CA Desert Sun on November 2, 2013 quoted author and artist Doe Zantamata who said, " To be happy, you don't have to do anything new. You just have to remember how to believe again...Believe everything good is possible. Believe in your dreams. Believe in people. Believe in love. But most of all...believe in yourself." The author, his wife, their family and extended family and friends never stopped believing in his wife's recovery, and I think, in themselves. Read this book and believe.

Paul A. Riecks
November 4, 2013

ittakes2_reviews_2

This book is a must read for anyone with a family member with breast cancer. It takes you through the spouse's perspective from diagnosis to recovery. Mark journaled his wife's journey and put all of his emotions out there. It is beautifully written and inspiring to anyone going through breast cancer. Thank you, Mark for sharing Debbie's story.

Jmu1109
October 23, 2013

ittakes2_reviews_2

A friend recommended this book. This was a great perspective of a man standing beside his partner and passing along to the reader fear, hope, useful information and a broader story than his own. I loved Vinnie the tattoo artist. This is a great book. Thanks for sharing, Mark and "thanks for caring"

Blahsan

ittakes2_reviews_2

This book is a must read. What sets this book apart from other books about surviving breast cancer is that it is told by the husband and his point of view, not from the survivor. At times sad, at times poignant but even through the worst of it you can always feel the love he has for his wife, her strength and the strength of their extended family and friends. The posts that are included from their friends and family lets you really into the heart and strength of the family. I would recommend this book to anyone who is currently going through this, whether you are the person or the caregiver. I also recommend this book to anyone who has a friend that has been or is currently going through their fight now. It was an eye opener for me.

L. Bogash
Seven Valleys, PA

ittakes2_reviews_2

There isn't a shortage of books about breast cancer, but most are written from the perspective of the person who has battled cancer or a physician or other expert. What an enlightening experience to read about breast cancer from a husband and caregiver's perspective! Not only does the author give us insight into his wife's experience and emotions, but he openly shares and reveals his love, compassion, support, and, yes, sometimes anger at the disease as he stands by his wife's side during their journey to beat the beast. Your story may not be the same, but I guarantee if you have a loved one battling cancer, you won't go wrong reading It Takes 2.

 PattiM
September 25, 2013

 

ittakes2_reviews_2

From the moment I opened this book I never stopped reading. Mark invites the reader to come along on this journey that his family went through. I cried, laughed and learned so much. This book will give comfort and knowledge to those going through similar situations. Most importantly, Mark and his family never give up. They get knocked down and get right back up. They fought cancer together and with their strength, determination and will to prevail... They do!

 Jenny Schloss 

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