We’ve all been doing this from the time we could speak, we’ve been selling. Selling ourselves, our wishes, our desires, our needs to someone else to get them to do what we want them to do. From the time a child can say the word “no” or “yes” the sale is on – with no stopping in any area of his/her life.
It’s simply human nature to go out after it and sell to get it – don’t forget you’ve been doing it since you could speak (maybe even before). The sale is a rush – the sale makes you feel better, sometimes euphoric – but what about the person on the other end of that sale? How does it make them feel? Did you lay the groundwork for a relationship to begin, one which can be maintained, nurtured and developed? Or is that person just another life on your hit list to cross off and then move on to the next target, or your next conquest?
The trick, the transformation is to go from one four-letter word to another. Want to change your future and the future of other people?
Then help, don’t sell.
When you shift your perspective to what other people need, instead of just what it is you want the ground shifts as well, the universe starts to move in a new direction, desires are fulfilled on both ends and a relationship can be planted and nurtured to blossom.
When it comes to business it’s not passion, enthusiasm, conviction, urgency, or desire that is the best trait of someone who is a top seller, at least not one who will remain at the top — it’s empathy. In his book, The Entrepreneur Rollercoaster, Darren Hardy talks about selling this way:
If you want your sales and marketing messaging to connect with people on a gut level, if you want to grab their hearts and move them into action, then you have to get in their gut. To connect with, not just communicate to your audience, you have to feel what they feel, experience what they experience, and think like they think. It’s time to get in their beds, mentally, of course!
What are they thinking about? What are they worried about? Who are they worried about? What do they fear? Who do they fear? What do they hope for? Who do they hope to impress? What are their desires, ambitions and goals? What do they think they need help with?
Don’t just think about these questions feel them. Write down what you feel and be as descriptive and raw as possible. You will find much of your best sales and marketing language in those words – language that shows you know who they are, who they are trying to become, and what they are trying to do. You will create language that is rich with empathy. With it, you’ll be about to speak from their perspective and straight to their hearts from your own.”
The same strategy – working from the heart – can work in any area of life. Give with gratitude, be present and aware and in tune with all around you. Look for the need and fill it – by helping, not selling.
Until next time, thanks for taking the time
Mark Brodinsky, Author, Blogger, Podcaster, Speaker, SpeechWriter, Emmy Winner, USHEALTH Advisors
Author: The #1 Amazon Best Seller: It Takes 2. Surviving Breast Cancer: A Spouse’s Story
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